We challenge the idea that being older means we are over the hill. We believe being older means we have the time to try something new. I defy the old adage that once you are retired you should settle down with daytime TV or knitting. I would rather walk naked and barefoot over red-hot coals! The concept that in retirement we should put our feet up is definitely a thing of the past. We remain reasonably able - although I accept that as we have got older the adventures have become a little more sedate, that we approach things more slowly and it takes longer. But we still seek out new experiences. How about going into Leeds Bus Station and randomly choosing a bus without any idea of where it’s going or when it will return - and getting on it? The Bus Pass is an amazing passport to all sorts of adventures. Just because I am 75 and Phil is 81, this should not stop us. This is the time to say Yes, because we have the time. And we have no idea of how long we’ve got. A few years ago, when we told our family and friends it was our intention to spend a couple of months camping round the Scottish Western Isles with our 20-year-old cat and our dog, they were horrified. “What if you die?” they said. “What if we do?” we replied. One Scottish friend just looked incredulously at us. “Scotland in May and June? You must be mad. And at your ages with an ancient cat and a dog too. You’re certifiable.”
 
Saying Yes can be anything. It means something different to everyone. It could be as simple as trying a new recipe, walking a little bit further every day or listening to a different genre of music. It’s about being open to trying something new. After all, if you don’t like it, you don’t have to do it again. Just move on to the next adventure. Don’t stick with it if you aren’t enjoying it. When the first lockdown was announced, we realized we had to enrich our lives in whatever way we could in our new, smaller world. We drew up a list of 70 things to do whilst locked down. Some were small tasks, like repotting plants; some were larger tasks, like painting the kitchen. I loathe painting! In over 50 years of decorating, it’s a skill that I have never got better at. I am incapable of decorating without making a huge mess, which then takes longer to clean up than the painting itself. Phil had a lot of wood, mostly given by friends who had excess quantities, so he set about building a wooden shed at right angles to the existing small extension. We had long wanted somewhere to disrobe after walking in the rain; he created it and called it the Dog House. It is not so named because he goes there when he is in trouble with me (well, maybe sometimes), but because it contains all the paraphernalia that comes with owning a dog. We have life in front of us. Surely it can be exciting to be challenged out of your comfort zone? You don’t have to be good at anything, that’s not the point. You will have had all these wonderful experiences. That makes you an interesting person, no matter how well you do things.
 
How to start? Find something you are interested in and see how far it will take you. Admittedly, it’s hard to get going, so take a few small steps. After all, if you decide to take up jogging you don’t start by putting your name down for a marathon. The fear of failure is one of the reasons people don’t try anything new - but what have you got to lose? If you end up with a bit of egg on your face, so what? Failure is not having tried it in the first place. On our list was, ‘Cycle Daily’.
 
In those early days of lockdown, ‘The List’ had to be obeyed. So, after years of neglect in the shed, I resurrected my old bicycle. After all, the paths round the local RSPB reserve were flat and relatively even. It wasn’t until I fell off the third time and badly hurt my knees, that I had to accept that my reflexes in my 2 artificial knee joints were not sufficiently quick enough to save me from hurting myself. As we age, recovery is so much slower. Although it was difficult for me to admit, I couldn’t do it. I was obliged to put my bike back in the shed. “Maybe another day perhaps?” Phil suggests in the background as I write this. “Never again!” I reply. But at least I had a go.
 
Do we say Yes to everything? I was talking to a friend about the philosophy and he asked me this: if someone came along and offered me a timeshare apartment somewhere - would I say Yes? It made me stop and think. In reality, there are lots of times when we don’t say Yes. There are times when we need to give the matter considered thought and discussion. But for the most part when the question involves an invitation to do something, we do say Yes. We can sort out the possible problems later on - which then might end by inevitably having to say no!
 
The beauty of being older is you don’t have to impress anyone. If something doesn’t go quite as anticipated: stop. At least you’ll have another experience in your life, another dimension. And another story to regale your friends with. We are so lucky in Leeds because there is so much on offer: free concerts, volunteering opportunities, dozens of organisations with activities to suit everyone, all just waiting to take you somewhere you have never been.
 
Another Say Yes story. Three years ago, we found a flyer in a magazine offering holidays in Northern Cyprus. They started at £150 per person for a week! Flight, bed, breakfast and an evening meal, several trips to historic sites more - huge value for money. It looked too good to be true - probably was too good to be true. Phil thought we might be conscripted into the Turkish army. But we said Yes anyway. In less than a week after we got the leaflet, we were flying off to Cyprus. It was a wonderful trip with lovely hotels, good food and excellent weather. We even got a refund of £70 each because our flight was delayed. A small risk which turned into a joyful experience.
 
Of course there may be family pressure not to go on a zip wire or white-water rafting (both exciting and exhilarating), but we are adults and we are competent to make our own decisions. We never urge our adult children and grandchildren to give up their dangerous pursuits, so why should we? We have raised families, maintained homes, been (relatively) law-abiding, had jobs, careers, loved and been loved, made a zillion mistakes. So why stop now? Life is an adventure which ends when we die. We need to take every opportunity while we can. Friends who have suffered loss through death or divorce, or who may live alone anyway tell me their lives have been enriched by saying Yes to a new experience. It gives them a reason to get up in the morning, dress with a bit more care and a feeling of anticipation and excitement about the day ahead. I’ll leave you with some instructions. Get a piece of paper and write this down: “I will Say Yes to …” And fill in the blanks. Let us know how you get on! We’d love to print some of your own stories of saying YES!

How does it feel to say Yes to something new? We spoke to a group of older people in Leeds who did just that. Sunshine in Leeds is a Health for All project that has welcomed older people who are lonely or isolated. The group run social events, walks and other group Activities.